The State of the Relationship

toddler hugging mom, smiling with joy

I’m going to be honest, my relationship with the older boys has not always been easy. There are certain aspects of their collective personality that either clash with mine or at the very least are completely incomprehensible to me. Is this their fault? Nope. Mine? No, I don’t think that either. I do believe that I have responsibility here. After all, I’m the adult. But it’s not really a blame or a fault situation.

Much of the difficulty I have with them centers around learning and their work ethic. In a nutshell, they don’t believe they can learn and they avoid anything that looks like it might be challenging. Drives me nuts, because I know they can do it. I know they can.

Anyhow.

Each year of school has really been less frustrating than the last. No doubt about it. This year is our best ever together; although it still hasn’t been easy. The good news is we’re less than two months away from finishing 4th grade and we’re all still here. I’m looking forward to the day next month when I can look at them and say “You did it!! You finished 4th grade”. Then we’ll go off and have a great summer together, building our friendship and having adventures.

When we finished school last year I honestly didn’t like the boys very much. Loved the heck outta them, but like? Not so much.

This year is different. I actually like them. On top of that they seem to like me too. I get lots of random hugs and kisses, and we’ve had many conversations that seem to have stuck in their heads. At least, I think I’m having an effect on them.

So. I’m thinking that this is a positive report, and that we’ve only got good things ahead. I’ll keep working on my own patience, increase my Love and Logic skills, and build build build our friendship this summer. That should give us a good foundation for school again in the fall.

Then we start again.

Originally posted at GNMParents, now archived at ForeverParenting.com.

Earnest Parenting: help for parents who want good relationships with their children.

The editor-in-chief of Earnest Parenting, Amy is the mother of two sets of twin boys. Yes, they drive her crazy, but they also make her laugh occasionally. Amy enjoys writing, quilting, reading, and working on her burgeoning cyber empire.

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