Comments on: How Do We Combat Entitlement? http://www.earnestparenting.com/2008/11/29/deal-with-entitlement/ Encouraging heroes. You can be one too. Wed, 08 Feb 2012 16:05:38 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 By: Amyhttp://www.earnestparenting.com/2008/11/29/deal-with-entitlement/comment-page-1/#comment-3830 Amy Wed, 07 Jan 2009 05:19:01 +0000 http://www.earnestparenting.com/?p=303#comment-3830 Mary if there's one area I'm failing in right now it's following through with immediate consequences instead of giving warning after warning. Every once in a while I manage to remember but usually I'm halfway through the warning when I realize I'm running my mouth too much. Again. And don't get me started on the whole remembering consequences thing. I make them things like "no tv for the day" and usually forget even that, lol.I figure if I'm noticing my mistakes more often that's half the battle, right? Now I just have to learn to avoid them in the first place.Val, leverage is absolutely the thing. And perhaps I should write things down too. Sigh. I'm to young to have a memory this flawed. Mary if there’s one area I’m failing in right now it’s following through with immediate consequences instead of giving warning after warning. Every once in a while I manage to remember but usually I’m halfway through the warning when I realize I’m running my mouth too much. Again. And don’t get me started on the whole remembering consequences thing. I make them things like “no tv for the day” and usually forget even that, lol.

I figure if I’m noticing my mistakes more often that’s half the battle, right? Now I just have to learn to avoid them in the first place.

Val, leverage is absolutely the thing. And perhaps I should write things down too. Sigh. I’m to young to have a memory this flawed.

]]> By: Val Garnerhttp://www.earnestparenting.com/2008/11/29/deal-with-entitlement/comment-page-1/#comment-3744 Val Garner Mon, 29 Dec 2008 21:42:44 +0000 http://www.earnestparenting.com/?p=303#comment-3744 Well the good thing about computer and gaming stuff is it gives you leverage for grounding! Your idea of writing groundings down on a calender is good, or even locking up the equipment, both great suggestions. I would think locking it up would be less confusing and less issues of being able to sneak to the equipment when no one's looking. Well the good thing about computer and gaming stuff is it gives you leverage for grounding! Your idea of writing groundings down on a calender is good, or even locking up the equipment, both great suggestions. I would think locking it up would be less confusing and less issues of being able to sneak to the equipment when no one’s looking.

]]> By: maryhttp://www.earnestparenting.com/2008/11/29/deal-with-entitlement/comment-page-1/#comment-3738 mary Sun, 28 Dec 2008 20:49:28 +0000 http://www.earnestparenting.com/?p=303#comment-3738 Wow! So many great comments! Personally, I'm blaming it on all the computer stuff/wii etc....just kidding but that is one thing I would not purchase if I had to do it over again!!!! I agree on the having my kids trained to wait until the third time....I was so much better at expecting them to obey immediately when they were younger....when did I start to let that go? Probably about the time I "thought" they could do things without me double checking. My "new years resolution" (not that I usually make a point of making these) is to be more consistant on MY part. Follow up and discipline as I "threaten" so it's not just empty threats. This may mean more writing myself and my spouse notes and dates of grounding from electrical appliances on the calendar for reminders. Any other ideas on how to be consistant when you yourself are probably a bit unorganized naturally? I'm thinking I need to actually pack away the gaming systems when they're grounded and lock them up. I'm still trying to figure out how to deal with the computers. I can lock off the internet but they need it for schoolwork....do I just take the mouse when I'm not going to be around to make sure they're only doing schoolwork? Any suggestions. I'm loving all these comments! Wow! So many great comments! Personally, I’m blaming it on all the computer stuff/wii etc….just kidding but that is one thing I would not purchase if I had to do it over again!!!! I agree on the having my kids trained to wait until the third time….I was so much better at expecting them to obey immediately when they were younger….when did I start to let that go? Probably about the time I “thought” they could do things without me double checking. My “new years resolution” (not that I usually make a point of making these) is to be more consistant on MY part. Follow up and discipline as I “threaten” so it’s not just empty threats. This may mean more writing myself and my spouse notes and dates of grounding from electrical appliances on the calendar for reminders. Any other ideas on how to be consistant when you yourself are probably a bit unorganized naturally? I’m thinking I need to actually pack away the gaming systems when they’re grounded and lock them up. I’m still trying to figure out how to deal with the computers. I can lock off the internet but they need it for schoolwork….do I just take the mouse when I’m not going to be around to make sure they’re only doing schoolwork? Any suggestions.
I’m loving all these comments!

]]> By: Amyhttp://www.earnestparenting.com/2008/11/29/deal-with-entitlement/comment-page-1/#comment-3723 Amy Sat, 27 Dec 2008 00:03:33 +0000 http://www.earnestparenting.com/?p=303#comment-3723 That's what I get for letting children talk to me while I'm trying to type, lol. I wanted to say that I've noticed lately that I have the boys trained to wait until the third time I ask them to do something before they comply. It's annoying! Yet I'm the reason they do that, because I don't institute a consequence after the first time they don't respond. And even though I realize what's happening, I still haven't figured out a solution for the problem.Basically, if we're not making one parenting mistake, we're likely making another. I guess we're all human, eh? That’s what I get for letting children talk to me while I’m trying to type, lol. I wanted to say that I’ve noticed lately that I have the boys trained to wait until the third time I ask them to do something before they comply. It’s annoying! Yet I’m the reason they do that, because I don’t institute a consequence after the first time they don’t respond. And even though I realize what’s happening, I still haven’t figured out a solution for the problem.

Basically, if we’re not making one parenting mistake, we’re likely making another. I guess we’re all human, eh?

]]> By: Amyhttp://www.earnestparenting.com/2008/11/29/deal-with-entitlement/comment-page-1/#comment-3722 Amy Sat, 27 Dec 2008 00:00:52 +0000 http://www.earnestparenting.com/?p=303#comment-3722 Air Jordans, what a blessing to have a thoughtful child! I agree that a good deal of it is inborn. I know that I can train myself to react certain ways in situations, and a great deal of the entitlement behavior is learned. Or taught, depending on who you are in the situation. Hopefully we can build habits in our children that help them avoid the mistakes of the entitlement mindset.Val, you hit several nails on the head there. I keep wishing I could fast forward to when the older boys are grown and download all that wisdom then go back and start over with them at birth. We'd all be so much better off!You're describing a whole generation of kids whose parents didn't say no. Reports of college grads expecting the corner office and the 6-figure paycheck are starting to abound. You're correct to say it was a mistake, I'm just saying you're far from alone. :)Ultimately I think we all do it. How hard it is to say no to those beautiful eyes! My boys are experts in just asking over and over and it only takes me giving in once every hundred times to reinforce the behavior. Oy. I think spoiling grandkids is going to be fun. I'm so glad you see growth and improvement for both your sons. Lord willing they'll come out with even more wisdom when He's done refining them. Air Jordans, what a blessing to have a thoughtful child! I agree that a good deal of it is inborn. I know that I can train myself to react certain ways in situations, and a great deal of the entitlement behavior is learned. Or taught, depending on who you are in the situation. Hopefully we can build habits in our children that help them avoid the mistakes of the entitlement mindset.

Val, you hit several nails on the head there. I keep wishing I could fast forward to when the older boys are grown and download all that wisdom then go back and start over with them at birth. We’d all be so much better off!

You’re describing a whole generation of kids whose parents didn’t say no. Reports of college grads expecting the corner office and the 6-figure paycheck are starting to abound. You’re correct to say it was a mistake, I’m just saying you’re far from alone. :)

Ultimately I think we all do it. How hard it is to say no to those beautiful eyes! My boys are experts in just asking over and over and it only takes me giving in once every hundred times to reinforce the behavior. Oy. I think spoiling grandkids is going to be fun. I’m so glad you see growth and improvement for both your sons. Lord willing they’ll come out with even more wisdom when He’s done refining them.

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